Learning how to swim

Over the past two years, I have been trying to teach my daughter how to swim. Last year it was the kiddie pool, where she only got the bottom of her pony tail wet. We also tried in the bath tub how to hold your breath under water. Well, she didn't like the feel of that, either.
This year, on a trip to Miami, there was a 0 degree entry pool, with the deepest point about a half a head deeper than Olivia was tall. I wanted to try again, so I came up with two rules: 1. Don't panic in the water. 2. Don't breathe under water, because we aren't mermaids. We tried and tried, and finally she went under! She was so proud of herself, and I was, too! She actually went underwater all by herself, and couldn't wait to tell people.
Next week we go to Mexico. I'll let you know how my little fish did!

Family

Ever since I came back from my trip out east for my nephew and God-sons 1st communion, not a day goes by without me thinking of how lucky I am to be a part of my family! Through all my siblings marriages,divorces, family ups and downs, we always are there for each other. In bad times, we become a shoulder to cry on, an open ear; in good times, we exalt in the happiness, and laugh easily.
We try to make a get together at least once a year, and some of us are better than it than others, but we try. This year, all six of us will converge in a small town in Vermont, a town where we were raised during summer breaks. We will be joined with our children, our spouses or partners, and just have a family time! I am fortunate that both my parents are alive and well. There will be at times when my sibs and I will revert to being kids! We'll reminisce, tell stupid stories about each other and laugh about it, and just be happy. We will talk into the night on dads back porch. Hopefully we can go fishing! I would also love to show my daughter the mountain that I used to play on when I was a kid, a mountain since 1976 my family has been a part of. The old ranger station; the reservoir; the beautiful trees... the same mountain that one can see from my dads back porch. For the kids to see. For us to see again. To reconnect.
Yes, I am fortunate indeed.

It has been four years this weekend since my little bundle of happiness was born! On reflecting, she has been the best thing to ever happen to me. She has taught me a lot about myself: I CAN survive on broken sleep and function; I can nurture, grow, help guide, and love another human being; I can handle projectile vomiting and not puke myself.
But seriously, when we celebrate her birth this weekend,I am going to celebrate everything about her self. Her eyes, her hair, her soft (though at times, quite loud!) voice, her skin, and her little smile! Her spirit, which is so wise beyond her short years here on earth, her triumphs, her reasoning... I could go on and on.
I am going to celebrate the gift this weekend of sharing a human life, and I thank God for every second of it!
So, Happy Birthday, my little Boo! Papa loves you!

Letting go.

It is going to be a new beginning for me- my own personal "Happy New Year", each word broken down from that phrase literally.
1. Happy; I will be joyous as much as possible, as I am responsible for my "self".
2. New; as in, going forward, I will open myself up to new beginnings, new way of thinking. New. Bright and full of promise.
3. Year; well, that one I don't have a good phrase for! I know it will not take me a year to get it going!
Why? I think I have been going through a lot of changes lately, taken some hits over the past few years, and am just ready. Ready to be happy. Letting go of the people that want to hold me down, or back, or not letting me move in the direction that I know I must go in. Just let go of the negativity. Just. Let. Go!

It always takes me a few days to come around when Olivia goes to her other papa's house. I usually busy myself with cleaning, laundry, gardening, pet stuff, etc., the first day. Well, today she was on the forefront of my mind while I was cleaning.
I started vacuuming the kitchen, moving the dog crates and getting all the dirt from under them, then moved on to the dining room, and then the living room. While cleaning the living room, I moved first my big comfy chair, then the sofa. As I was thinking about her, I started vacuuming behind the sofa. I stopped when I saw the bright yellow construction paper and green pipe cleaner flower we made a couple weeks back lying face up. I picked it up and it brought such a smile to my face! It was like a gift from above! I love life and all its mysteries - you never know what will happen next.

Rain

I woke up this morning to the sounds of my puppy whining. The kind of whining that is really, really annoying! Anyway, it is 5:03 in the morning (I looked at the clock in my room)and slipped on some slippers and into the kitchen I went. I let him and my other dog, London, out, and- RAIN! Yuck. More wet dog smell, dirty kitchen floor ( I literally just mopped the night before), and muddy pups from playing in the grass I mean mud. I let them back in after they did their business, and promptly went back to bed. This time, I opened my window a bit, and the sound of rain put me back to sleep in no time at all.
I woke up around seven (Oh, NO! Get Olivia up from bed! Take a shower! Press our clothes! Make her a lunch! Feed the dogs, cat, fish! HURRY! Oh, but first your coffee!!) and felt really relaxed (after the initial mental flurry, see above!).
So, got her up from a deep slumber by softly singing to her, and we were on our way to a good day.
So, on the way to school/work, I said,"bummer. This rain is a bummer." Then,from the back seat I heard, "But rain makes the flowers grow". How right you are, sweetie! Thanks for putting things in perspective. Sometimes we need a little rain in our lives to make our own flowers, so to speak, be more worthwhile.

Mothers Day

Tomorrow is Mothers Day, with a capital "M" and "D".
So much of how I parent I get from how my mom parented me. I talk things through with my daughter. When she gets a scrape, I put some neosporin and a band-aid on it, and hold her until the crying stops. Like my mom did for me. When I was upset, I knew I could always go to mom for some comfort, and I want to be that for my little girl when she gets older. It is important to have a loved one you can turn to in times of distress.
My mom is simply amazing. She raised six kids- age 1 through 10- for most of the year by herself- and we all turned out great, no drug or addiction problems. Most of all, and most important of all, we turned out to be good people. We are there for each other. Not that we are all in close proximity, but only a phone call away. And let me tell you, some of us got the same cell phone service to cut down on the minutes!
Sometimes when parenting gets a little challenging, I can't help but think of how my mom handled all of us with all of our needs.
The answer is love! The answer is always love when raising kids.
So, mom, thank you so much for raising us all with love, even during the most trying times! I LOVE YOU!
And to all the moms out there, HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!
And p.s.- you were right about the perm- it didn't look that great on me after all!